Hassocks Fatboys 3-2 The Blades

Sussex Sunday League Division Five
Sunday 30th September 2012
Waterhall

 

Nine months after Carlos Tevez made a triumphant return from exile in his home country, another striker playing slightly lower down the footballing pyramid marked his own comeback with a matching performance.

Hassocks Fatboys forward Stuart Hunter hasn’t been seen for four weeks following an unplanned trip to his far flung homeland of Newcastle. It was Hunter’s introduction from the bench against The Blades that turned this Sussex Sunday League Division Five game on its head and provided the platform for the Fatboys to pick up their second win of the campaign.

The only word which can be used to describe the Fatboys’ first half performance is woeful. The Blades could and probably should have been out of sight long before Hunter replaced the veteran John Kearvill 10 minutes into the second half. Blades striker Chris Clayton hit the bar, Scott McCarthy denied Clayton’s strike partner with a fine one-on-one save, Jason Gander hacked one off the line and a free header from a corner was put just over as the the visitors dominated the first half.

Somehow, the Fatboys turned around trailing by just the one goal. Clayton was the goal scorer, the man mountain being allowed with far too much time and space on the edge of the box, allowing him to produce a delightful lofted finish that nestled into the very top corner of McCarthy’s goal.

In response to the dreadful opening 45 minutes, Fatboys manager Daniel Lawrence abandoned 4-3-3 in favour of a switch to 4-4-2. The change allowed Rhys Kearvill and Rob Lloyd to get into the game more in the wide positions with Lloyd going onto claim man-of-the-match following a thrilling second half performance out on the left. Stuart Ridley and debutant Dave Standing began to establish a foothold in midfield and once Hunter joined Chris Martin in attack, the Fatboys finally began to create some opportunities.

JK was the man sacrificed to get Hunter onto the pitch, not that the veteran seemed too bothered. So injured is he currently that his legs were wrapped in enough bandages to make it look like he’d been mummified. Hunter’s return isn’t just good news for the Fatboys in front of goal, but it will also give JK a much needed rest. Hopefully, the next time we see him on the pitch he won’t resemble a man whose body is quite literally being held together by strings.

Hunter had been on the pitch for just five minutes when his first goal arrived. There was a deceptively strong wind blowing towards the water works end of Waterhall and it caused The Blades goalkeeper to get into a bit of a mess when Ridley whipped a cross in. As the visitors’ number one spilled the ball, an almighty scramble followed with Hunter eventually reacting to smash the ball home in predatory style.

Martin thought he’d put the Fatboys ahead when he finished with aplomb after being played in, only to see the goal disallowed after a questionable linesman’s flag. There was nothing the linesman could do five minutes later when Matt Martindale opened his Fatboys account. The Blades only half cleared a corner and when Lloyd picked up the loose ball, most would have expected him to deliver straight into the box.

Lloyd though had spotted Martindale lurking with intent and he picked out the full back on the edge of the box. Martindale brought the ball under control, stepped inside one defender and hit a swerving effort from 25 yards underneath the body of The Blades goalkeeper for 2-1. It was a lovely goal and whoever was trying to wind Martindale up afterwards by describing it as “a back pass gone wrong” should hang their heads in shame.

Seven minutes later and the Fatboys made it 3-1. Defending set pieces has been a real Achilles heel for the Fatboys so far this season, so to see them score from a set piece of their own was extremely pleasing. Rhys’ corner found Gander in the box who produced the sort of footwork he normally reserves only for the disco room in Oceana to Cruyff turn his way past two men. Gander then laid off to Hunter who fired home what would prove to be the winner.

There were 15 minutes for the Fatboys to hold on and needless to say, they made it as nervy as possible for the large crowd looking on. A quick break left The Blades striker in one-on-one and he duly beat McCarthy for 3-2. Quite what all of the Fatboys’ midfield and several of the back four were doing stranded up front when the hosts were defending a two-goal lead nobody seemed to know.

Clayton nearly hit the corner flag with a wayward shot which Martyn Buxton prevented going out for a throw. Buxton’s comment of “That’s worse than anything I’ve done” seemed a bold shout, but surprisingly fate was on the Fatboys’ captain’s side and he managed to get through the final 10 minutes without producing anything inept. Clayton did nearly have an equaliser in a goalmouth scramble but McCarthy pounced from nowhere to go full stretch and nick the ball off the striker’s foot just as he was about to pull the trigger.

Gander was lucky to escape a card with a typically cynical foul on the halfway line which was followed by a high-pitched “What was that for ref?” Apparently, this inhuman noise from Gander caused carnage among the dogs at the RSPCA shelter across the A27 at Braypool. McCarthy was then on the receiving end of The Blades’ wrath when he began rolling around on the ground screaming following a challenge which was nearer to Patcham than it was to the Fatboys goalkeeper.

The final chance went the Fatboys’ way and it would have rounded off Lloyd’s excellent performance had it gone in. The left winger cut inside and bent and effort towards the top corner but The Blades goalkeeper pulled off a stunning save to somehow claw the ball out.

In the end, the Fatboys had done enough with their superb second half performance to pick up three hard earned points, moving them three points above their opponents in the table. There is no fixture next week owing to the Club’s golf trip which several members of the Fatboys’ squad are on. Hopefully, the more senior players won’t aggravate their injuries further on the golf course although given that JK especially is behind held together by superglue at the minute, it wouldn’t be a surprise.

 

Hassocks Fatboys (4-3-3)

Scott McCarthy
Two decent stops in each half and his confidence in coming for aerial balls helped negate the threat of The Blades’ massive strikers.
Matt Martindale
Looked to get on the attack from right back and that positivity was rewarded with a fine 25 yard goal. Not a bad way to open your account.
Andy Rumble
One superb tackle in the first half and a number of key blocks. A promising partnership with Gander seems to be building.
Jason Gander
His great/unlikely footwork led to an assist for Hunter’s winner. Got away without a card for a cynical foul, perhaps because the referee was scared of his high-pitch squeal
Martyn Buxton
After a couple of outings at left wing back in the 3-5-2, he was handed a more defensive role as a traditional left back. Responded with a solid outing which included some super set piece deliveries.
Stuart Ridley
Playing on the right of a midfield three didn’t really work in the first half. Was much more accomplished when reverting to his normal central role after the break.
Dave Standing
A promising debut for the Fatboys’ latest signing. He turned up, created a load of chances and then went home.
Rob Lloyd
Ran the game when he was moved out to the left wing as part of the tactical reshuffle, grabbing an assist with a clever pass for Martindale’s goal.
John Kearvill
Returned on the right of a front three but struggled to get into the game, possible due to being embalmed. Withdrawn early in second half.
Chris Martin
Despite being the smallest man to ever be selected to play as a striker through the middle of a 4-3-3, he did reasonably well. Looked more dangerous when joined by Hunter.
Did reasonably well as a central striker, more dangerous with Hunter.
Rhys Kearvill
Struggled in the first half which was hardly a surprise given he was a right winger being asked to play on the left of a front three. Much better when restored to his normal berth.

 

Subs

Stuart Hunter
Two goals from the bench for the Geordie bad boy on his return to action. He completely turned the game after being introduced.
Ron Pennicard
Unused
Daniel Lawrence
Unused
Kevin Ward
Unused

 

Goals

62′ Hunter, assist Martindale
69′ Martindale, assist Lloyd
76′ Hunter, assist Gander

 

Man-of-the-Match

Rob Lloyd gave an action packed performance in which he excelled on the left after the change to 4-4-2, claiming an assist in the process.