Hassocks Fatboys 1-3 Physics Athletico
Chances are we saw the side that will end up winning Sussex Sunday League Division One at Clayton Rec on Sunday, and it wasn’t Hassocks Fatboys.
For the second time this season, the Fatboys went down to an impressive Physics Athletico outfit who have now completed a league double over Scott McCarthy’s men. It will take something going seriously wrong between now and the end of April to prevent the title going to Seaford.
In the first meeting between these two back in September, the Fatboys at least had the excuse of being severely under strength for their 4-1 loss. A whole host of first choice player were mysteriously struck down by injury and unavailability ahead of the long trip to Seaford, almost as if nobody wanted to make the 45 minute journey to the east. To add to the reasons for that heavy defeat, reserve team full back Nick Davie had to play the second half in goal after McCarthy’s calf blew up with the score evenly poised at 1-0 to the hosts.
There were no such excuses on this occasion. The Fatboys were at full strength to the point where the mythical figure of The Wizard Jamie Weston was even available for his first appearance in three-and-a-half years. But not even the presence of a man with a left foot more powerful than the Elder Wand could inspire the hosts onto victory as Physics left with all three points in a 3-1 success.
Things were relatively even for the opening 20 minutes, neither side really creating much as it became a war of attrition in the middle of the park. For the Fatboys, Ronnie Devonish and Jack Lewis both covered plenty of ground to win possession back but they struggled to bring the front three of Dave Keane, Jordan Walsh and Stuart Brown into play.
Walsh’s cause wasn’t helped by a nasty ankle injury he’d picked up playing the previous day for Horsted Keynes. The Fatboys top scorer probably shouldn’t have started and he eventually succumbed to the problem at half time, by which point his side were 2-0 down as Physics struck twice in the space of five first half minutes.
The first of those involved some spectacularly bad defending from a corner. Just when you thought that things couldn’t get any worse than last week’s goal conceded against Bison Beer when the ball trickled through the box to the back post at 2mph, the Fatboys managed to go one better by failing to clear on what felt like 27 separate occasions with the end result being Physics eventually accepting the gift and smashing home. The second came from an over hit cross out on the right which saw McCarthy doing ‘a Jones’ as the ball sailed straight over his head and in at the far post.
Walsh’s withdrawal at the break necessitated a raft of adjustments from the Fatboys. Rhyan Thwaites entered proceedings in place of the striker to take up a position at right back with Rob Lloyd switching across to the left, Chris Britton moving into the centre to join Dan Turner and Ryan John pushing up front.
It also meant that the armband passed to Turner who made history by becoming the youngest ever Fatboys captain at just 18 years of age, a deserved accolade for a string of fine performances since he signed for the club back in November and reward for his decision to break his new year’s resolution of not playing Sunday League football ever again after only six days of 2019.
Turner led by example, rattling the Physics crossbar as the Fatboys went in search of a way back into the game. His long throws were also causing all manner of problems with Britton and Brown both coming close to converting.
The Fatboys lived up to their new-found reputation as a long ball team when they pulled one back 10 minutes into the second half. McCarthy sent a kick out of his hands down the left hand channel for Brown to chase and he duly latched onto the ball before producing an over hit cross of his own for a carbon copy of the goal Physics had scored in the first half.
McCarthy then made a solid stop from a one-on-one and Britton and Turner both had to put in crucial blocks to prevent Physics adding a third. Ananda Hoque replaced Lloyd in order to give the Fatboys more of an attacking threat from the full back positions with Thwaites barrelling forward in trademark style down the other flank and it sort of worked as the hosts laid siege on the Physics goal for 10 minutes.
John hit a post, Weston drew a brilliant save from the goalkeeper, Lewis saw a pile driver blocked and Keane hit the side netting before going down in the area under a heavy challenge but remarkably, no penalty was forthcoming.
That frustrated the Fatboys and they lost their heads hugely in the final 10 minutes, allowing Physics to add a third when the tricky left winger got away down the line and pulled the ball back for the striker to finish with a tap in.
The Fatboys mood was not improved by the fact that the ball had been at least five yards out of play, something that was missed by Jon Ballantyne on the line who said afterwards he couldn’t see it as he’d forgotten to wear his glasses.
This brilliant excuse didn’t sit well with Lewis, who began shouting at the top of his voice “THE BALL WAS OUT YOU F**KING C**T” at Ballantyne. When the referee attempted to pull Lewis up on his language towards an official, Lewis’ rant continued. “HE’S MY MATE, I CAN CALL HIM A F**KING CUNT BECAUSE HE IS A F**KING CUNT.”
This is technically true of course. Had the referee been present when we had to spend half an hour driving around Cheltenham in a minibus looking for Bally who had decided he wanted to try and walk the 17 miles back to Evesham at 1am on a Wednesday morning, then he might have agreed with Lewis.
He certainly would have done if he’d been there the time that Bally was kicked out of the Club for being absolutely hammered at 3pm, went home and had a sleep, came back at 8pm and then got asked to leave again within half an hour of his return.
The labelling of Ballantyne as a “c**t” was in fact the only thing the Fatboys got right all morning. As a result, their title hopes hang by a thread. Should Physics go onto be crowned Division One champions, they’ll be worthy winners indeed.
FATBOYS 4-3-3
Scott McCarthy
There wasn’t much he could do about either of the goals. Made one excellent second half save with a strong hand from a one-on-one. Claimed an assist with a huge punt up the field for Brown’s goal.
Rob Lloyd
Gave a decent account of himself at right back before switching across to the left in the second half. One outside of the boot pass up the line was outrageous.
Ryan John
Some first class blocks and interceptions during his 45 minutes at centre back. Unlucky not to score when moved up front in the second half.
Dan Turner
Became the youngest man to captain the Fatboys in the clubs history and responded with a man-of-the-match showing as one of the few men in green to emerge with any credit.
Chris Britton
Did his best to get forward from left back before moving inside to centre half where he made some vital blocks and interceptions. Took great pleasure from Lewis’ meltdown.
Ronnie Devonish
Put in some firm challenges in the important holding midfield role and tried to keep driving the team on even as the odds became increasingly stacked against them.
Jack Lewis
He actually had a very good game in midfield but that will forever be overshadowed for him completely losing his mind with Ballantyne for Physics’ third. A fantastic reaction.
Jamie Weston
First Fatboys appearance since April 2016, he came into the game more in the second half and was only denied a goal on his return by an excellent save.
Dave Keane
A quiet game by his normal high standards as the Fatboys struggled to bring him into things. Had a couple of decent runs and probably should have had a penalty too.
Jordan Walsh
Frustrating morning for the Fatboys top scorer who played through the pain barrier in the first half before eventually limping off at the interval.
Stuart Brown
Claimed another goal with a mishit cross from out on the left. Seems to have overcome his phobia of defending in recent weeks and could even be seen tracking back on several occasions.
SUBS
Rhyan Thwaites
Offered an attacking threat from right back as the Fatboys attempted to pour forward in the second half, linking up well with Keane.
Ananda Hoque
Came on for the last 20 minutes at left back before being moved up front as the Fatboys desparately sought a way back into the game. Played some clever passes in that time.
Jon Ballantyne
Unused
GOALS
54′ Brown, assist McCarthy
MAN OF THE MATCH
Nobody really covered themselves in glory, but it just about goes to Dan Turner who had another fine game.